5 Things you need to know before marrying a Filipina

Marrying a Filipino

Marrying a Filipino? I have heard a lot of people say “Filipinas are one of the most beautiful women in the world.” As true as that statement may be within the Clever Filipina authors :p , beauty alone cannot give you a successful marriage. So for the clueless men out there who are thinking about finding a Filipina spouse but does not know a thing about us, I suggest taking a rain check. Reading this blog might just save you from having a horrible marriage and from contributing to the Filipino hater blog. Yes, there are a lot of racist blogs out there about the Filipino people that has emanated from pure ignorance and frustration.

For those who have fallen inlove with a Filipina, chances are, you have already brought your lady love to your home country. Here is a little list to help you understand your wife to be, it’s only fair since she moved her whole life to be with you. This list is applicable to most Filipino women, but not all. Be aware that like everything else, there are exceptions to the rule.

 

1. We value the presence of our family

 

My husband’s family is spread all over the USA. The US is a vast country which takes days to travel from one coast to the other. Having said this, it’s okay for them to see their family once or twice a year only. However, this is not the case for your Filipina wife, who didn’t grow up this way. It may take a while for her to get used to this custom but she’ll get used to it eventually. But you need to understand that it might take a little while.

 

Filipinos have very deep regard for family. They are each other’s support system not only because they are related but most of them grow up next to each other’s home, a walking distance away, or a ten peso tricycle ride away. A typical afternoon would consist of relatives or neighbors and oneself playing piko (native game) outside in the dirt. The house was always packed with family members gossiping and enjoying a bottle of juice with pandesal. This is why most Filipinos living abroad get homesick. The closest family a Filipina wife has is YOU. Everyone else is a 20-hour flight away.


2.  We are not wasteful. So please take it easy around us.

 

On my husband’s 33rd birthday, I got him a really nice cake from Red Ribbon. We had 3 slices and I put the cake in the fridge. The next day he asked me if I was going to eat some more cake. I said no. I did not mean I will never eat of the cake again, I meant no, not yet. Maybe later, maybe tomorrow. He shrugged and threw the entire 3/4 of the cake into the trash. I was high-pressured!

Growing up in a third world country, you see poverty everywhere. My parents have always taught us 3 things about food : only put in my plate what I can finish, never waste anything because some people do not even eat at all, and always give away if I have anything extra. Most of us grow up this way, so if your wife gets mad at you the next time you throw away a perfectly good half-eaten anything, you know why.

3. We respect our elders

 

Filipinos respect elders so much that most of us will refuse to put our parents and grandparents in a nursing home. We will take them in until their last days on earth. At a young age we were taught respectful responses like “po” and “opo” and blessing the hands of our elderlies as a gesture of respect. Due to this close family ties culture Filipinos are often there when families are in need.

If you are not in good terms with your parents, chances are you will hear about it from your wife. It may be none of her business but it will bother her inside.

4. We will take care of you… and everything else.

 

In the Philippines,we follow a very traditional family structure. Papa is the head of the home, he brings home the bacon. Mama is the foundation. She takes care of the kids, the budget, the food, the home. There is no equality, there is expectation. Papa works hard, comes home and rests. Mama may work if she wants to, but she is still expected to make dinner, feed the kids, do the dishes, take out the trash, and still fulfill her wifely duty to keep you happy.

We do not believe in divorce, we believe in growing old with the one we love. If she grew up in this kind of family, chances are she will do exactly this and take care of everything around you. Cherish her. Help her out. You will not find another woman who will treat you like a king the way she does.

5. We will send random stuff back home to the Philippines

This one of the biggest controversy about Filipinos around the world. Why do we like to send random stuff or even money home?

 

It is no secret that the Philippines is governed by corrupt officials. We have good educational institutions but we do not have educational support. Filipino parents are expected to take care of their kids school tuition fees until they graduate college. We do not have the ability to take out loans like all the other countries in the world. We use cash. Cold, hard cash. Filipinos value education because it hard to get, it is hard to get because it is expensive. It is almost impossible for a normal Filipino family to put their kids through college. I know what you are thinking, “why don’t the teenagers get jobs?”

The Philippines does not have jobs to give to teenagers, unless you run your own business. Even a McDonald’s job has an age and educational requirement. For a regular, middle class Filipino family, putting kids through college usually involves pawning land or getting an extra job.

If you do not attend college, your job options are slim to none. Most of them will be server jobs with a minuscule paycheck. If you did attend college and are able to find a good job, or if you got lucky and managed to change your stars even without going to college, it is only appropriate that you help out your parents. Even after we leave home, we still feel the need to help out because we know how hard our parents had it. So we send money home, to help out a little bit so they do not need to work hard anymore. Or we put our younger siblings through school so our parents do not need to spend again. If your parents are having a hard time, believe me, we will help them out also.

As we go through our new life in a new country, we have new chapter, we see new things, we meet new people, we discover things that would have made our lives easier if we had it back home. So we send it back home, we share with them our experience, our new life.

Only when you understand your wife’s heart, why she does the things she does, will you be able to understand her completely. She may have her little quirks, but she can be the best thing that will happen to you and your family because she is a Filipina.

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131 Comments

  • Frank December 5, 2017 at 9:37 pm

    I am a British man who has been chatting online with a Filipina lady daily for several hours over a period of nearly 2 years. She is working a two year contract in Saudi Arabia. My girlfriend is returning to the Philippines February 2018. We use Skype and other apps. We communicate from the time she wakes up until the time she goes to sleep. She uses her mobile in the toilet often during the day to leave me messages. When she gets goes to bed she chats with me for two hours before sleeping. This is what I learnt from communicating with my girlfriend about her personal character. First she would never ask for money. She expects total honesty & loyalty from me. She has been loyal & honest with me. A one man woman. My girlfriend is only 5 feet 1 inch tall. Slim & beautiful but also sexy. I am 6 feet tall male. blue eyes, Brown hair & masculine. My girlfriend has been telling me for a long time that she is deeply in love with me. How she looks & responds in communication her feelings are easy to observe. My girlfriend is a passionate & sensual woman. A woman in love wants & needs physical connection. At the moment it is making both of us crazy. That we cannot meet until February 2018. At the moment we both have ways of giving each other arousal & release online. This means we are lovers in our minds. I wish men luck in Finding a suitable partner. I think it will not be easy to find a diamond among the many Filipinas online.

    Reply
  • Brian Tatum November 23, 2017 at 7:12 am

    Yes this article is very true I’ve met 3 different women from Philippines 1 only spoke Tagalog so unfortunately we can never communicate in person it would be awkward the second one is very educated but so naive has 2 children by different men who she can’t locate never ask me for anything but she is VERY community and family obligated I didn’t understand but now I do I just thought she was putting me on hold or playing games with me I’m 45 she’s 27 and I believe truly loves me but I’ve started talking to an older widowed philipina and I must admit she’s the one that has captured my heart and has raised her children and would be interested in marrying me and I’m looking forward to seeing and hearing from herv2-3 times a day we communicate on messenger and she has captured my heart she works and has an outstanding education and this article is dead on because all of the woman who I met we’re just as the article say thanks for this article it’s truly a blessing for a man who has interest in the women from the Philippines

    Reply
  • SBone November 21, 2017 at 1:55 pm

    I am married to an amazing woman from Mindanao. But I was very choosy in my search and I would warn all lookers to be likewise. To the author I would say, your article paints a little too rosy a picture. The Philippines is a country of great poverty and a sub-par education system. That’s a toxic mix and the result is a culture that’s been oppressed for hundreds of years. Consequently, ignorance, indifference and self-preservation drive many of the citizens. That’s a human condition and certainly reversible, but the legislative mandates of the political do-gooders in Manila rarely make it past the walls of their pesos-lined offices.

    If you’re searching for a wife in the Philippines, I offer this advice:

    1. Know your search criteria and make it abundantly clear in all online ads. Scammers will just pass you by and you will not be flooded with responses. I started with “READ THIS BEFORE YOU REPLY”.

    2. Sob stories and request for money are an instant NO.

    3. Test early for unwanted character flaws like short temper, illogical jealousy, or illogical thinking period. Don’t expect even college graduates to have the ability to converse about a broad range of topics, and expect a certain amount of superstition, but set a standard for logical thinking.

    4. Test early and often for lying and cheating. Set up alternate accounts and test. If found willing to cheat or lie, don’t argue, just move on. Oh, and don’t think she isn’t doing this same thing to you.

    5. Socio-economic status is a fine-line. A beautiful, businessman’s daughter from Makati is no different than a beautiful, businessman’s daughter from L.A. The qualities that are often espoused on these type blogs permeate from the lower social and economic class where you are a dream come true. If a pretty, young, lower-class Pinay had the luxury of dreaming about a cute, 25-year old Pinoy, college-grad who is going into the family law firm with his dad, she would. She doesn’t. So the 2nd best dream is a foreigner (and they use that term broadly), preferably still mobile and functional with the economic wherewithal to care for her, and possibly her children.

    6. Meet her in person for an extended period, two or three times. Don’t let her rush you or give you deadlines. She will be willing to chat with you online a lot and Filipinas are mostly all quite charming. When you meet you’ll be able to discern much more. She may blow your mind with sex. Heck, half the porn these days is an Asian girl doing something. So when your brown-skinned, long-haired beauty makes Asia Twilight look like a rookie, you may not have a defense for that. That’s ok, When the dust settles, do plenty of other things together and see if you really enjoy being with her and if she seems to really enjoy being with you. Here’s a big test. Filipinos are tied to the their cell-phones. Does she pay more attention to you? Then, go back home, and evaluate, and give it more time, and then visit again.

    7.Pay close attention to the family situation. Please read this carefully. I’m not exaggerating or overly-generalizing. Parents and grandparents instill in their children at an early age a warped sense to duty to care for the parent even while the parent is perfectly capable of taking care of themselves. They subtly disguise is as respect. Parents enlarge do not follow the western tradition of saving for their children’s future. Neither do they leave for them an inheritance. And unless you are a driver, farm worker, or fisherman, there are no jobs for Filipino men over 40 outside the major metropolitan areas. So the uneducated, unassuming man (and they are plentiful) will often sacrifice a daughter for the family’s welfare. One choice is send them overseas to be a maid or domestic worker. The daughter then sends every pesos she makes home to meet the needs and vices of the parents, brothers, sisters, nieces and nephews. Option two is much like option one…daughter marries a foreigner. I personally experienced both of these situations. When my wife-to-be returned from Malaysia as an overseas worker her parents had squandered all of her money and her two boys were malnourished and wearing rags. The parents were cool when I first met them, but their intentions eventually became clear. My wife had used her last bit of money to set her parents up in a small but sustaining piggery business. But they weren’t interested in business; they wanted a gravytrain. I had already made up my mind that I would not be taken advantage of, so we refused to financially support them. They got pissed and didn’t attend our wedding but my wife and I are perfectly happy with the outcome. Amazingly, they have not starved. We decided the best way to help was with the niece’s and nephew’s education. But our “line in the sand” was giving money to perfectly capable adults.

    8. Test her motives. Does she want you or a greencard? I was fortunate enough to retire fairly young, so I recommended I move to the Philippines to live with my bride instead of bringing her to the U.S. This sealed the deal for me because my wife-to-be make it very clear she could have cared less about moving to the states and she continued to be the great woman I had known all along. Now with that said, you will need to come to terms with the fact that just like your Filipina meets certain psychological, emotional and physical needs of yours, likewise you meet her need for security…which she may have tied into moving to a Western country. The question comes down to this: Does she plan to trade up after objective one is met?

    I really do not mean to be cynical, because I have an amazing wife and I do hope for other men that you find the same happiness. My wife doesn’t have a lazy bone in her body. She loves her children immeasurably (though she is a dragon mom) and is as loyal, loving and caring as I could ever imagine. She’s my workout partner, my confidant and my best friend. She’s Martha Stewart in the kitchen and Asia Twilight in the bedroom!! I took the time to make this list just to let you know that 1) You need to establish a search criteria, 2) You need some boundaries, 3) You need a plan and 4) you need to be well-informed.

    Good luck and God Bless You!

    Reply
  • Rob November 14, 2017 at 7:55 am

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    Reply
  • Goonie October 20, 2017 at 5:07 am

    Momma “…takes care of the kids, the budget, the food, the home.” UNTRUE.
    The maid or maids take care of all those things except the budget. If not the maid then the lola (grandmother) does. Even when money is tight there’s a maid in the family. The wife lives a leasurely life while the husband breaks his back or his brain working every day. That is the truth and the sad reality.

    Reply
  • Leslie October 13, 2017 at 10:04 pm

    I have been to the Philippines and think it’s very beautiful but very poor. We do have more opportunities here in the states. It’s also a survival. I’m happy to say I have been there a few times and had the pleasures of my daughter in law and her families great hospitality. There beaches are beautiful. It’s a shame that not only the Philippines but lots of third world countries are amazingly beautiful and so much poverty.

    Reply
  • Leslie October 13, 2017 at 9:46 pm

    No most American families grew up with family next door. Family around always. I know I did and your husband did until he was in junior high school. But unfortunately times have changed, economics have made families move elsewhere. No I am not happy seeing my kids n their families only a few times a year but your kids go to school, daycare whatever it is. Most of u work and not at home. No one has the funds to travel back n forth unfortunately. We are not ok with seeing family twice a year. It’s the distance and not everyone makes a hundred thousand a year to allow them to do so. Even with that u can’t pull kids out of school when ever. It’s not always what we want. It’s more what we have to do to survive To take care of our family.

    Reply
  • Ready to take a chance August 25, 2017 at 7:46 pm

    I have recently met a Filipina online. She is all that you say they can be. She lives were her family, unmarried, has a 4 year old son. She has a good job that pays next to nothing. She has not asked for money but I sent a little so she can get good internet at her house and we can talk more. I plan to go over in a few months. As a test, I created a new Facebook account and tried to start a conversation with her. She shot ‘him’ down right away and the very next day told me about the entire thing (with screenshots). She is beautiful, funny, smart .. and I believe loyal. I think I have a good one 🙂

    Reply
    • trevor armstrong November 14, 2017 at 2:39 am

      good luck it does sound like shes nice girl hope it works out because everything that is said about Philippine women is true, i know my wife is from cebu, we married 5 years ago. she is everything as said above plus some…

      Reply
    • Cam November 17, 2017 at 2:16 pm

      You are stupid. She has a kid. She’s been sleeping around. Have fun loosing your hard earned money.

      Reply
  • Jean August 2, 2017 at 5:38 am

    This article is helpful to some foreigner that are intersted to looking to filipina.One hints you found the filipina woman who will be with you through thick and thin is that she never ask financial assistance from you. She will never get tired looking for english words to describes her days and. ever gets tired
    talking to you. She is so happy to tell about you to here family and friends. She wants to know you more and your family no money involves. If a filipina starts to say financial problems then watch out. An ideal woman don’t ask anything except for your pictures😜 They want you to send them photos a lot of photos. and if you want to gift them something from the buttom of your heart give them cellphone with camera or smartphones and they will so happy and for sure you will recieve a lot of photos from her daily thing too as we love taking pictures too. Then when everything is settled down you and filipina decided that you are a match don’t be so scared as some filipono family still
    practices the tradition that parents wants a gift from you either material
    or emotional but some
    basically parents wants you to take care of their beloved daugther and they might sometimes whispher to help them when everything is ok to help fix thier shack like the roof of the house and that. but it is up to you if you help them or forget about it. The best thing if you really serious on marrying a filipina is to meet her and her family in the Philppines. observe them carefully and beware if higjtech girls or city girls you recognise them easily a good filipina girls
    mostly leaves in the provence there are some from the city but most of them had seen more media influences and soap operas on how to become rich without flexing muschle just by hunting rich older
    man or a gold digger. I tell you when you found that special someone, a pinay shall we say you will not regret. she makes sure you are her baby. You only need to give her time when she gets here in the foriegn land as she will adjust the whole being of this person. There is nothiing she can’t do. A filipina that grow poor and strugled from the begining knows a lot in life. Once she settled down. she is everything you need. great companion, great loving person, and hardworking. One thing she wants you to do is live her back and her family as she will
    wants to work so she can help her family back in her country. She is embarrash to ask from your hard earned money too thats why she wants to work. Don’t hurt her ever or she is hard to forget that and so sensitive to swearing words. Keep her spiritual and physical needs fulfilled. She loves to travel onces you two made it in the future. those special
    places she heared if you are in USA she sure like to see Chicago 😍 as the Chicago Bulls so popular in the Philippines. Also she wants to see New York the tall building she seen in the book in the school. she wants to see Blue ridge Mountain as it is always heared on country songs make her dremas come
    true. even though she is older she still wants to see desny🤗 and the universal , this is not going to happen in just one year it will be an evolving way of you twos life here in the US. There are really times just like a normal
    married life that arguments comes out in the blue, but it is healthy relationship to have fights as long as you twotalk it out together. mostly its going to be not you the problem it isgoing to be other member of the family back in Philippines that bother her. Her prostrations that she can not be there when she wants to hits that little bro or sisters head when something going wrong in theor life. She is teying ro help young siblings back home and they are going ro the wrong way and added financial problem
    to her, and thats whay she is so destressed. All you have to do is to let it go and be her advicer. aleays uplift her spirit when she is down. she will turn 360 degrees when she know are her hero in a situation like this. Remember it is the two of you to build your dreams. It is fun marrying a pinay😜🍾🍰 Remember she loves to travel, i think it is a bunos as long as you two work for it and don’t charges it the credit cards hahahahha. A filipina knows how to save for that travel good. she loves to marvel this earth. Another thing she wants to be a mother so if you can not give a child to here you need to tell her in advance. so she can think of that ahead. But most of them too try to overlook not having a kid. If you have kids from previous relationships you have to make the moves on inteoducing your children to her, make time a bonding moments with jer and teach you children ahead of time to reapect her like call her “Auntie of mommy” if they want. filipina are shy they will be sometime hiding in the bedrooms when teen childrens are home. So your job is to make sure bring them
    all together like luch or dinner together and make some fun activities just your children and your new wife. Another important thing is keep your ex away in the picture in the start. You talk about you ex to your filipina wife, but wait untill
    tells you she watns to meet your ex. Filipinas are not cultured to be friends with the exs. Filipinas are very zealous person. they feel so hurts seeing exs talking to you. so you have to set up agreement about your children with your ex not to hurt your filipina. remeber this is just short term
    maybe one to two years and onces she sees you true to her and she will let lose eventually. So many stories to tell as all of this is base to my own stories. I meet my foreigner husband in 1999 online. He went to Philippines in 2000 visited me and my family for ten days. In 2001 he petitioned me to come as fiancee and we got married. In 2003 we have our son. and thanks God my husband understand
    my all being and he would never
    let
    me
    go back in hard life. I did attended 4 yeats in college in Philippines but did not finished it since I moved here in the USA, He knows my dream as a
    kid was to be a nurse and he fulfilled that dream for me by sending me to get my nursing carrer. I am so happy to be with him and am sure he is happy of having me too. And age was not the hendrance of all as we have 23 years age gap he was 46 and I was 23 when we meet. We love looking forward to our future and our son. He never stop helping my family back home his own foundation as he fondly says it. And of course My balikbayan boxes are always on the go with
    whatever I find during my favorite past time garage sale hinting😜😜😜 My husband always makes sure I have rice cooker, rice, fish and vegestables. Prepare your self to have outdoor stove as pinay have to eat the dried fish andsome
    fun funky food. Learn ahead of time where to get those asian food or oriental store nearby. When I came here in the USA it was hard for me because oriental store is about 2 hours drive from our place. walmart did not have asean food yet. Anyways I have to stop for now. I am just enjoying reading all comments here in this post. I don’t blame some foreigners victimized or some
    pinays that gone into the wrong hands. It is really A little bit of luck to find a perfect match. Thank you for reading my comments in here. I just love sharing my American dream. Don’t give up keep on searching and pray and God will line you up a best one, promise because I got one in God’s blessings! God bless us all. Have a nice night all JGG❤️❤️❤️❤️🌺🌺🌺🌺💕💕💕💕💕💕😇😇😇😇😛😜😍

    Reply
  • Janettorbeles1@gmail.com August 1, 2017 at 3:14 pm

    I love my, American. Bf even we’re. Far. We’re. Both happy. I’m a. Filipina. I’m truly love himso. Much much

    Reply
  • Mark June 17, 2017 at 3:44 pm

    It sounds like they cant fully move on or grow up 100% if you cant move on completly from family thats a part of growing up and moving on. Now that being said its ok for visits but why would you even send money back to where you came from. They see us as rich because our money is worth more but they dont understand the cost of living here in the US.

    Reply
    • Harold July 10, 2017 at 7:21 pm

      Unless you’ve been to the Philippines you truly can’t understand how poor they really are. The average worker at Jolibee starts out at 350-500 php a day! That’s roughly $7-10. Most things are cheap there, but the income is very low so it somewhat balances itself out. I know a teacher that makes 10,000 php a month. She has a bachelors degree. That’s about $200 USD for an entire month. Rent is also very expensive in Manila. Apartments typically cost about 7,000-10,000 for a place that we would condemn in the US. So sending $150-200 a month really is life changing for them and likely only your fast food budget (maybe just mine). In terms of the family part, it’s not about growing up. That’s Asian and Catholic culture in general.

      Reply
      • trevor armstrong November 14, 2017 at 2:43 am

        true harold also its not as simple as in the west to move away from home when you cant afford to, plus a big reason for family to stay close in phil is that most times without family you would be sunk, especially if your ill and need treatment then everyone helps out with everything.

        Reply
    • Violet July 16, 2017 at 12:47 pm

      Yes you’re right, cost of living is high in the US, but keep in mind Philippines is a very poor country with hardly any jobs. In US, you can still easily find lots of jobs like in services and live independently without any government help. Over there, there’s so many college educated people but no available jobs, and there’s no welfare system whatsoever. It’s like survival mode everyday for most. Pay is usually only few bucks a day. Imagine living with only $3.00 /day?

      I rarely send help to my family back home because they’re not very poor. They have their own businesses. Sometimes, problems like inefficiencies create big opportunities too I guess.

      Reply
    • SBone November 21, 2017 at 12:11 pm

      Mark, there’s some truth to what you’re saying. Remember though, this is a Catholic Country, not a Christian country. Like it or not, U.S. values are based on Protestant principles where a man and woman marry and then are expected to LEAVE their parents. Which brings me to another point…considering the country is overwhelmingly Catholic, you can’t find a Filipino who can tell you three things that Jesus taught…like “love your neighbor, turn the other cheek or don’t lead others astray.” Government is not the only oppressor here. The Catholic Church plays a large hand as well. I know I’ll make some mad for saying that, but I live here and I can back it up with empirical data. There’s no divorce for example, and the average Filipino will attribute that in some way to the Church. But legal separation and divorce proceedings are the way in which a civil government ensures its women and their children are properly cared for and property is fairly distributed. The Church says NO contraception, so fifty-two percent – let me say that again – FIFTY TWO PERCENT of the children are born out of wedlock. How can a country ever evolve out of third-world, poverty stricken status given that statistic?

      Reply
  • Mark June 6, 2017 at 3:20 am

    Do women in the Philippines expect their husband to provide them children of their own hence creating a family of their own.

    Reply
    • Violet July 16, 2017 at 12:53 pm

      It’s the culture over there to have kids once you’re married, but it also perfectly Ok if you don’t want to have one.

      Reply
    • Nellie October 4, 2017 at 3:24 pm

      Please read my comments on Philippinos

      Reply
  • kanu2007 May 28, 2017 at 9:40 pm

    Here is list:

    – Philippinos (not only women) know nothing about geography, politics, economy or any relevant subject you want to discuss. Unless Miss Pageant contest if you favourite subject, you will have nothing to talk about.
    – philippinos have zero critic spirit skills. Criticize them, their country, their president, or anything else, is like run into a brick wall.
    – you will never marry a Filipina. You will “marry” the whole (large) family. It’s like a “package deal”. Think of it as your private charity…
    – every filipino family is dysfunctional… Expect a whole range of typical traumas and social/psychological issues to deal with…
    – sex is great. If it’s that your drive, it might worth the effort, at least while is fun. If not, keep searching…

    Reply
    • reformed July 9, 2017 at 3:59 am

      They work hard and are family oriented but are dysfunctional trainwrecks? That doesn’t seem to line up

      Reply
    • SBone November 21, 2017 at 11:27 am

      Yeah, you’re mostly right (I’m American living in Cebu, married to a great woman), but let’s take these one at a time.
      1. As a dude I’d rather talk with my wife about how the kids are doing in school, how her business is going, how my business is doing, how the cafe racer build is going, what’s for dinner…and then tell her how great her butt looks so she’s primed for sex tonight. I have friends and associates with whom I can talk about other heavy shit.
      2. “Critic Spirit Skills”?
      3. That’s only if you’re weak and can’t draw boundaries. Before I met my wife, her parents stole her money for 4 years while she was in Malaysia working. As soon as I realized what was going on we had a long talk about this Filipino concept that if one family member becomes an overseas worker then the rest of the family gets to mooch. I explained clearly that I worked hard for my retirement and her family gets no part of it. It pissed her parents off and they didn’t attend our wedding. So what? But we’re helping her nieces get a good education. We just refuse to give money to perfectly healthy adults. And don’t give me the “poor” routine. I live here. There are ample ways to make money.
      4. Agreed. But no different than any other family anywhere else.
      5. Since I married my wife I don’t even watch porn anymore. Filipinas don’t have sex with you out of pity or a sense of duty. They have sex with you because they love you, they sincerely want to please you, and they really enjoy sex. That is every man’s dream come true.

      Reply
  • Filipino Women May 16, 2017 at 3:16 pm

    This list is on point! How come you know so much? 🙂

    Reply
  • Filipino Women May 15, 2017 at 5:36 am

    Thanks for sharing this one! Great post! Do you have an article talking about marriage experiences with a Filipina?

    Reply
  • Jonathan Goodwin May 10, 2017 at 9:58 am

    Jonathan i am married to a Filip. I never know .now I can truly understand my wife.thank you

    Reply
  • Filipino Women May 6, 2017 at 2:14 am

    Filipinas treat a Man better, it only makes the American Man more dedicated to make his Filipina Happy because she appreciates his efforts.

    Reply
  • Casey April 22, 2017 at 3:04 pm

    Have been dating Filipino for about 6 months now and has been the most exciting days of my life. From sydney Australia, we met on line have not looked back. I’m 35 and she is 34 currently doing visa for her now to visit.
    Have met her twice already and next trip 1 month from now. She lives in manila and what a amazing country and a amazing lady. Met the parents in province and the rest of family. Very close and kind people. She is very well educated and generous. I find dating her is refreshing and real. We have decided to get married next year.
    I have changed my ways here now. Will eat all of leftovers and nothing wasted. Be blessed with what you have!

    Reply
  • BRUCEWAYNE O DELL April 16, 2017 at 8:22 am

    This article may be true for some, but in the eleven years I have been married to my Filipina I can honestly say the story is complete propaganda.
    For one thing, education here is atrocious at best, not expensive, just dancing and singing with very little education involved.
    We had to take our daughter out of a fairly high priced private school because by the third grade, they still hadn’t taught her to read.
    She is doing very well now as I have enrolled her in an online school from the states.
    She had to repeat the second grade along with tutoring instead of the 3rd grade she was supposed to be in here in the Philippines.
    I could go on and on, but I recommend that you do serious research before you try to raise a child in this God forsaken country.

    Reply
    • SBone November 21, 2017 at 11:46 am

      Totally agree about the education system Bruce. My two boys started private school this year in Lapu Lapu City, but unlike the states, private isn’t better. No discipline, and like you said, the whole day is spent preparing for the next cultural event. We’re home-schooling on an American curriculum next year.

      But, with regard to the country as a whole…this is an entrepreneur’s dream come true. They haven’t invented shit here yet!! This is like the U.S. just after WWII. If you’re married to a Filipina you can start a corporation – you’re 40%, she’s 60% – and whatever you do you’ll become king! Ok, logistics sucks and there’s a lot of payoffs to make things work, but that’s just a matter of understanding the ground rules. I make it point to never speak derogatorily about the common people because they’ve been suppressed and crapped on forever. Instead, I see it as a mind-blowing opportunity to bring enlightenment (don’t mean that in a spiritual way) to a generally appreciative society.

      Reply
  • Suraj January 7, 2017 at 12:39 pm

    I m from nepal n i have been dating a phillipines girl n we want to marry what is the process for that.after marriage she had told me that we will stay in phillipines is work allowed for nepalese in phillipines

    Reply
  • E De December 27, 2016 at 5:00 pm

    I love reading about guys dating/marrying foreign women. I cannot wait to marry a foreign woman someday.

    Things about I love about women from the Philippines:

    1. their inner and outer beauty
    2. their ability to speak English well
    3. their exoticism
    4. their loyalty
    5. They seem like angels who were descended from Heaven

    A man who is married to a Filipina or another foreign woman is richer than a man who has so much money but does not have a happy and successful marriage.

    Reply
    • Zaki April 26, 2017 at 4:19 am

      I am dating a Filipina I love her already I cant lie everything u said I feel same way it’s like she a angle from heaven “”but I send her money after 2dayz of talking just because I want her to have anything she want now I been reading about gold diggers Filipinos women and it seems everyone says same thing about them she has her own money but it’s been 3 sad storys my phn will not charge need new one & I got bad report I can’t get my bonus this month so basically she asking for money every thing I read says same damn thing but I’m going trust her I swear to God I love her and believe she loves me but what to u guys think no matter what y’all say I’m goin keep loving her I’m going have her back she’s a wonderful woman very Kool funny she perfect

      Reply
      • reformed July 9, 2017 at 4:08 am

        Shes a scammer you have been scammed! thats if it is even a women could be a man too. sorry to hear this…

        Reply
        • SBone November 21, 2017 at 11:51 am

          Hey dude, yeah you’ve been scammed, but just move on. Now you know the game so lay down some ground rules next time. The scammers will just move on and the good girls will appreciate your strength. And be clear about what you want. There are many young, beautiful girls with college degrees who speak great English and don’t have 3 kids. Set your sights high and set boundaries.

          Reply
      • Randy November 14, 2017 at 6:19 pm

        Man keep loving her they are lovely. I married a filipino wife and I am so happy with her. Ive been there two times and I can tell you her family treat me much and way better than my family treated me

        Reply
    • Brent September 11, 2017 at 8:41 am

      I glad for you ….. i have been married for 3 year to a Filipina wife of 61….
      After 1 year her mother.. brother and his wife and 18 month old daughter moved in to our Basement until they get on there feet… it been 17 months later …. he worķs 2 jobs and his wife works part time…. There is no kitchen in the finished basement so they do cooking upstairs.
      Now me and my wife have zero privacy.
      I drop my wife at work at 7:am … and by the time I get home her mother is already chopping garlic in the kitchen. And now her brother is telling his wife he does not want her to work.
      I am scaeed that they will be with us for ever.
      I get so upset but cant display my mood swings in front of my wife …. its all about her family now….. I feel loved and all but ” last of all…
      The cooking is all Filipina food now.. fish after fish aftet fish…… pigs blood soup… food i wouldn’t feed to my neighbors dog…. but they love it… chicken feet …. pigs stomachs intestines… omg…. and smell of fish ( minoes )
      Boiled in vinegar…….
      My life has changed so much… and if I say even the smallest thing about anyone in her family
      Im always thinking she might devorce me…
      Can someone give me advise please.

      Reply
  • Robert Burianek October 30, 2016 at 8:59 pm

    On a Christian match I met a Filipina who has been widowed for eight years! She has made sure that her oldest boy graduated from college and her 17 year old daughter is getting her education plus making sure her niece is being educated!
    This lady is retired from her job lives with mother and a sister and children!
    She is very well educated is an real estate agent part time,, and other jobs she learned to make a living! She volunteers as a Catholic teacher on religion! Active in her Church!
    I am retired and a widower! I have been praying for discernment since my wife passed!
    I had a lot of matches but none really was interested in!
    Then one day I as checking matches this lady cought my interest! She texted me first got say hello! I replied and ever since see have been chatting twice a day for 4 months! Some just texting and then some Skype!
    We will be meeting her in the Philippines in December! I will be there for the holidays about 18 days!
    I have been reading and studying about the Filipino life style and their culture! As an American ii fully understand that it is necessary to learn more about different cultures!
    Our age difference is 10 years! I asked if my age was a problem! She responded that older men are understanding and patience! Ages were no barrier! We are of the same faith and are active in our respective parishes!
    Westerners need to understand the Filipino way of life! Just marrying and having sex is not enough to develop a solid relationship!
    I want to date and do things together! If need be I would move to Philippines just to court her to make sure we are both in love with each other!

    Reply
    • SBone November 21, 2017 at 11:52 am

      Interested to hear how things have worked out. I hope well!

      Reply
  • Jonathan C October 26, 2016 at 10:28 am

    Thanks for sharing information. This will help us.

    Reply
  • Jeffery October 17, 2016 at 1:16 am

    The five thing Are so true how do I know I married one

    Reply
  • JACK.A September 30, 2016 at 5:42 pm

    I HAVE FILIPINA WIFE,I DIDNT PICK HER UP IN BAR,SHE IS FROM GOOD FAMILY.SHE LIVES IN MY CONDO FOR MY MONEY ALMOST 5 YEARS.WHEN I GO OUT FROM THE COUNTRY,SHE CONTINUES TO MEET OTHER FOREIGNERS.ITS JUST SPORT FOR PINAYS,ONE THING THEY NEED_IT IS YOUR MONEY,AND ONE MORE YOU NEED TO KNOW.FILIPINA WOMAN ARE LIERS,MAYBE SOMETIMES THEY LOOK LIKE ANGELS,,DONT TRUST THEIM,COMMON I CAN TELL U MILLIONS STORIES HAPPENED WITH FOREIGNERS.

    Reply
    • Lori Coleman April 8, 2017 at 12:02 am

      You just not a bless or a lucky man for sure!

      Reply
    • SnowNov202015 May 3, 2017 at 7:45 pm

      not all filipina.
      im filipina married an American Man but he abused me treated me like slave.
      he was so nice when we were in Philippines but since i came here USA he changed.he lied to me and cheated on me.he beat me,drag me on the floor,he kicked me,he slappe me many times,he hit my head using my tennis shoe,he tried to choke me,He whipped me with a phone charger.Its not physical also emotional and verbal abused.
      i could not go anywhere.He always yelling at me,ordering me around and he also talked down on me.He wouldn’t allow me to go chuch nor would he take me.he was so controlling.He restricted my phone access,he beat me up.
      when i called cops his got mad and he abandoned me.
      and now he filed a divorce and force me to go back Philippines and offered bunch of money.
      but still i want justice of what he did to me.
      And now the state filed a case against him which is 3rd Degree Domestic Assault.

      so…not all filipina liars..i was a Victim with American Man.
      but i never thought that all Foreigners are abusers,cheaters and a liars.not at all.

      thanks:

      (Dec.11,2015) (this date i was hoping
      that he started change but he wasn’t.
      He said…. ” I’m a playboy, lover,cheater and a liar and its too late,im old to change.”

      Reply
      • Randy November 14, 2017 at 6:25 pm

        sorry to hear your story Snow. Take it easy and dont rush into anything. The right person will come into your life. I hate men who beat on women

        Reply
    • Rianna May 5, 2017 at 5:48 pm

      The same thing happened to my brother he is 45 the Filipino wife is 22. She sought him out on Facebook and after learning he has his own business and money she moved to the us now he is paying her and her family a salary!!!bunch of liars and she takes selfies and posts them on Asian sites

      Reply
  • LHY August 14, 2016 at 5:09 am

    FAMILY FIRST…..

    Reply
    • kc February 25, 2017 at 8:45 am

      and FAMILY includes wife or husband.

      Reply
  • Filipina women July 13, 2016 at 9:07 am

    yes i truly agree with family bonding & support. only about last thing i don’t agree with.

    Reply
  • Tina June 28, 2016 at 1:49 am

    But they dont respect other women and destroying their happinness and their life
    Can these still be called women? Honestly i doubt

    Reply
  • Joel June 16, 2016 at 5:05 pm

    Uh, all westerners are NOT wasteful, not even close. Please be careful about making blanket statements about an entire population.

    Reply
    • Rory hoven July 5, 2016 at 4:59 am

      I’m dating a “girl” from cebu. Untell you have seen the thrift of a girl form the pi you won’t understand

      Reply
      • Ruby Famo July 5, 2016 at 6:18 pm

        Your ‘easily offended’ culture offends me. I understand not all westerners are wasteful, just like not all Filipinos are thrifty. This was written for the sake of cultural differences.

        Reply
        • Rodney jones July 24, 2016 at 2:19 pm

          Amen Ruby you are so correct. Even those of us who do not consider themselves wasteful are very much so at least in the eyes of a Filipina woman.

          Reply
      • Ruby Famo July 5, 2016 at 6:19 pm

        @Rory Hoven, Preach

        Reply
    • Rodney jones July 24, 2016 at 2:10 pm

      Take it easy man most of us are wasteful you just don’t see it.

      Reply
  • Johnnie Walker April 7, 2016 at 1:15 am

    Full of cooked up and fake article.In real it is totally opposite.Filipinos don’t have moral values, most of pinays always ask money from foreigners. Most of pinays leave their husband and they have at least two to three boyfriends at a time.

    Reply
    • Ruby Famo July 5, 2016 at 6:23 pm

      Hi Johnnie, I did mention that there are some rotten ones out there. But hey, if you want to find the right woman, you gotta be the right man too. Don’t expect to pick up a class act in a bar buddy.

      Reply
      • Tom November 1, 2016 at 3:38 am

        Some rotten ones??😳😳😳 I would say 70% of them are rotten and all one has to do is walk around an SM mall on the weekend to see how many kids are walking around with no dads. Now there are good ones but you really need to pay attention and if they lie about anything big drop them there,move on.. A lot of these bad habits are a culture things for pinoys, they really don’t know any better for the most part.. They’ll lie just to save face and do whatever it takes to make themselves look good..

        Reply
      • Bob Weber August 1, 2017 at 2:20 pm

        I met my Filipina and she’s my life not just my soon to be wife. Your spot on in your remarks. It’s easy for us because we carry the same values. I don’t party and neither does she. I love her family already so much. Her mother was against her marrying a white man, but now loves the idea. Her family and I are going to open a restaurant in the Philippines, before we come to the U.S.. Then after we get her citizenship in the states, we’re moving back to the Philippines. As in any country anywhere, you have bad eggs. However, I never thought I would ever found a more loving wife, than I found in my sweet pinay.

        Reply
    • Lori Coleman April 8, 2017 at 12:11 am

      Hey johnnie, don’t say that not all filipina’s bad I’m a good wife of American man. You just not lucky or God not bless you a good woman.

      Reply
    • MegaStar275 October 22, 2017 at 5:56 am

      Stop stereotyping..bad people are everywhere..do you think woman in your country are not liars..dishonest and gold diggers.? After marrying you file divorce and get almost all of your assets..? Plus the restraining order..?

      Reply
  • Gilbert Chaussenery March 23, 2016 at 1:29 am

    oh yes that correct i did marry the wrong girls or nearly send me broke in AUSTRALIA or the divorce did cost me a lot, anywhere did work again very very hard to make money cause i did always dream to retired in the PHILIPPINES i love PHILIPPINA. ,now i am here in CEBU for 7 years and meet the most understanding girl from the province we been together for 5 years without problems . but before we enter in a relationships did make rules the FOREIGNER way not the PINOY way. did build a house for the parents a cheap one do help for food ,do have the 2 sisters at home or study to university in CEBU to have a job but educated them to the foreigner way so they will probably work abroad and ready for the transition i am the boss at home control the finance but make decision with my GF, do teach them how to handle a budget cause they have no clue at all. to summarized even been burn before i still love PHILIPPINES but the girls come from to another planet and wrong education we are in 2016 not in 1900 we have to progress in the right direction they parents try to educated them the way they where educated but unfortunately with the moderns world you are left behind so much competition those days what was working 50 years ago do not work today sure PINOY have value but they over do it that my opinion i was there in MAKATI when MARCOS left the country was there in the coup so i know a lot about the PHILIPPINES but no much changes more pollution,more poor ,more corruption more murder more car on the road ,internet bad.power bad water bad ect but i still love the PHILIPPINES unfortunately to many foreigners take advantage to the poor beautiful girls just coming here for a good time and vanish or live them pregnant i see that every day just go to the mall and watch was going on very sickening.maybe will upset some of you but my experience thanks

    Reply
    • Ruby Famo July 5, 2016 at 6:25 pm

      Thank you for your story Gilbert. It is indeed sickening. Makes me sick to my stomach. Sometimes you try really hard not to judge. The world is so broken

      Reply
      • Rodney jones July 24, 2016 at 2:24 pm

        I am so much in love with the most amazing Filipina woman on the face of this earth. She lives in Canada and is a resident there I am from the USA. She is everything you have mentioned in your article and more, and I for one Admire Filipina women because of her morals and family values. How she loves her family is just amazing. Hope you continue to write articles and teach people about the greatness of Filipina heart.

        Reply
  • Todd Whiteside January 2, 2016 at 6:31 am

    So, i have been dating a filipina woman for about 2 months on Facebook. I’m in the process of going over there. She wants to bring her daughter and come to live in the usa with me. It seems like this is very hard to do.

    Reply
    • Lorii Abela September 26, 2016 at 8:49 am

      If she is married, it will take take a long process and a lot of money to have her marriage annulled. I am actually just wrote an article about that. I will be posting it this Wednesday. http://www.FilipinaSweetie.com It will be posted with this title. How to End a Marriage in the Philippines When Divorce is Not an Option

      Reply
      • abiodun June 30, 2017 at 6:44 am

        Am in love with a Filipino woman.. .she has a boy of 10years old. .. She is also older than I do with 6years. And am an African. ..what advice can you give to me

        Reply
      • Michael Shea July 8, 2017 at 4:30 am

        I met and fell in love with a Filipina woman. We are working on her anullment now and will file a petition for K-1 visa the next day after the anullment. I love her family as my own. I send boxes to them and support her financially as she can’t work in the province now while we are processing. I love everything about her. I raised my own kids alone for the last 12 years and they are now off to college. She has none. She is my family, the most amazing person in the world. They tell me I’m a true philippino because I’m learning Waray and Tagalog and love the food and culture. We truly have everything in common which is why we fell in love to begin with. We’ve nevèr missed a day talking with each other since we met 18 months ago. Probably 6 to 8 hours a day. I hope i never stop learning about the culture there.the world would be a very different and better world if it adopted even a few traditions of the philippines. I wouldnt change a thing about her.

        Reply
        • MIke September 8, 2017 at 12:18 am

          Totally believe you…except…you love filipino food??? it is soooooo gross and I truly love Asian food be it Indian, Japanese, Thai, Vietnam, Chinese I love it all but Filipino food…yuck!

          Reply
        • Cam November 17, 2017 at 2:20 pm

          You are either really a stupid sucker or this was written by a Filipina trying to make themselves look good. What a joke

          Reply
  • Joseph Tuchin December 6, 2015 at 12:24 pm

    I intend to get married to a Filipino girl we have been going out to eat over the last 5 years how long does it take to get married in the Philippines and what is the condition

    Reply
  • Lili Clara August 20, 2015 at 10:25 am

    Coming from an eastern European country I can rightfully say Filipinas are not the the most beautiful women in the world. We share the same traditional values as stated above, except we grant women equal rights. Great majority of women work in ALL fields and are paid equally. Their mothers thought the same-therefore we don not have to support them 100%–but still take care of them and not lock them in a retreat house and forget about them.This mentality of supporting your home family-often with the cost of ruining your Western husband-leads in most of the casis in encouraging the lazziness. I’ve seen young women working their …off and their young valid brother staying home and drinking San Miguel all day long… What I am trying to say- do not generalize, judge every person individually.And no ladies, you aren’t the greatest wifey material in the world.

    Reply
    • Jimmy Rickard September 25, 2017 at 6:56 am

      Yes it is all about THEIR family, the husband is only a means to an end to get money to them. The reason they claim all the filipino men are not loyal, is their men know the women are not loyal. There is brainwashed and unhealthy loyalty to their own clan and a husbsnd is a very distant second. He must at least save her rent or expenses to increase how much money she can send, but if there is conflict and she must choose between husband and a sibling or even cousin or uncle etc, she will dump you. They use love bombing to brainwash children and then the women use it on men. Both ways creates a deoendency, it isnt real and can be turned off like a tap.

      Also a promise or agreement is just a momentary thing for them, they have no obligation to follow through in future. ‘That was before’ or ‘because…’ Also any and all complaint or criticism can be deflected with ‘are you perfect? “. Push the point and there is no debate, you are dumped or dead.

      Many things to like, like friendliness but childishness is a big problem that needs to change for them to do well without strict foreign employers.

      Reply
    • Cam November 17, 2017 at 2:22 pm

      All true.well said factsy.

      Reply
  • Gary Matthews August 14, 2015 at 11:47 am

    This is Mellinie and myself. Getting married if visa comes through in time, on the 29/11/2015. We met in a phone application. Not a dating site. We talked and then went to email, face-book, Skype. Dated online for fun which turned out to be more serious. Decided to meet. I sent her money to come to Australia. When she was here. I decided to propose. She said yes and then we got an agent and got relationship evidence together for a marriage visa which we are still waiting to come through.

    Reply
  • Kenneth Rose August 12, 2015 at 9:58 pm

    I really enjoyed this article. I am 52 years old and I have been communicating with a 43 year old Pinay for about 2 years. She has been working in Saudi Arabia for about 15 years now. She put her brother through 4 years of college and also put her sister through nursing school. I feel sure that she is supporting her whole family to some degree even now. She works 10-12 hour days 6 days a week and only gets driven to town for shopping once a week. I too worked in Saudi Arabia but only for three years. Anyway, I gave all of this background because it demonstrates the sacrifices many of these women are willingwilling to make. We are getting along really well and despite her situation she is always thankful and upbeat. I sent her a care package and she was excited like a little kid. It nearly brought tears to my eyes when she told me that was the first package she had ever received! I’ve since sent another. I have been so impressed with this Pinay! I’ve finally taken the plunge and bought my tickets to the Philippines just a few days ago. I am visiting her for two weeks while she’s home on vacation. I am so excited to meet her and her family! Are we going to get married? I don’t know but I do know that she has enriched my life up to this point and I am open to what God wishes for us both. Who knows…maybe I’ll be posting about my Filipina “wife” soon. Thanks for reading. Ken

    Reply
    • Cam November 17, 2017 at 2:27 pm

      Next you get to support her family. Have fun idiot.

      Reply
  • jack burton June 5, 2015 at 4:21 pm

    After being married to a wonderful, loving Filipina since 1974 I can certainly say she is more than capable of surprising me with things I still have not learned about the culture she grew up in. 🙂

    Here is our delightful red-headed, fair skinned granddaughter. She considers herself the whitest Filipina ever.

    Reply
    • Ruby Famous
      Ruby Famous July 7, 2015 at 2:47 pm

      What a beautiful photo! Thank you for sharing your story to us 🙂

      Reply
      • jack burton July 7, 2015 at 5:28 pm

        Thank you, Ruby. I am very happy and blessed with the loving family that God has provided for us.

        My wife and our marriage is fairly atypical from many Pinay relationships.

        Her father was a retired US Navy sailor from the PI in 1946 but he had his American citizenship also. He went home and married a young schoolteacher in Zambales and had five kids, all born with their US citizenship also. Their income level was quite a bit higher than many of the other people around them in their small town.

        They moved to the states when my wife was 18, and she joined the US Navy herself in 1973. They shipped her over to Okinawa Japan where we met on base and got married six months later on the island. She was of higher military rank at the time than me and in 26 years in the military together I never did quite catch up to her, so she always had a higher rank then I did. So I met and married a girl in Japan who was born and raised in the PI to two Pinoy parents but who was actually a US citizen and in the US Navy and stationed in Japan and who is now a retired navy veteran. It does get confusing when we try to explain the whole story to others. 🙂

        Her parents were not to thrilled with the whole idea but I made sure she finished her Bachelor’s and got her Masters in Education so that made up for a lot of my sins.

        Reply
        • Ruby Famous
          Ruby Famous July 8, 2015 at 3:31 pm

          Oh wow! Thank you Jack. What an inspiring love story. We thank you, your wife, and your inlaws for your service. Are any of your kids in the Navy too? I always admire Military families.

          Reply
          • jack burton July 9, 2015 at 2:43 am

            No. all three went in a different path than the military. They’ve given us wonderful, loving grandchildren and much pleasure and joy.

  • ER Gatuslao May 13, 2015 at 2:34 pm

    🙂

    Reply
  • Peter Kopite Holman April 30, 2015 at 9:21 pm

    I met my sobrang Maganda asawa when she came to england …. She did not come to be “rescued ” by a westerner she came to escape from yeaRSG of abuse and to gain qualifications to better support her children and to forget the past. She had no intention of finding anyone. But unfortunatly for her once she was in my heart there was no escape …. Now I love my wife and it saddens me to read so much negativity … I had 3 children of my own prior to meeting my wife and afterwards I now have 7 wonderfully beautiful and talented children I love them all equally regardless that my wife’s 4 are not biologically mine. I support them and help them financially and emotionally whenever I can. She does not ask for money from me I give willingly I don’t not expect my wife to wait on me hand and foot she
    Takes pride in looking after me and I in turn am proud to be her protector. We have fought to be together and struggled through hard times. But I would not change a single moment. As for the other guy Mr “my house is my house” I pity your wife she could do so much better then you!
    And miss American filipina… It’s shocking that your so insulting of your heritage obviously you didn’t get blessed with a true filipina heart!

    Reply
    • Ruby Famous
      Ruby Famous July 8, 2015 at 3:41 pm

      Thank you Peter! Thank you for being such a great husband to your wife and respecting her and her heritage. Your big family is a blessing and you are one heck of a man for taking that on. I know it must have not been easy, but you did it anyway because you love your wife. Thank you for being that way. The world could use a few more men like you

      Reply
      • Cam November 17, 2017 at 2:30 pm

        Hey did it because he is ignorant and wants sex

        Reply
  • ilookmarvlus April 28, 2015 at 1:59 pm

    Budget? My Asawa doesn’t understand the word, but everything else is basically true.

    Reply
  • Filipina April 25, 2015 at 11:10 pm

    Hi, I’m a filipina married to a foreigner. Thank you for sharing and writing about our culture in the Philippines. There is always advantages and disadvantages of it. But in any case, we are all good in nature and we love doing things we feel right for our family, friends and our surroundings. It’s difficult to separate us from what we believe from childhood just as you mentioned, respect for the older people, serve our husband, sending things or money to help our family etc. etc… We always like to do what is expected from us in order to satisfy the needs of our family. The most important thing is that we are always happy doing things to make our family circle happy too. It’s not actually because of poverty because we are used to that and we accept that from childhood. But it’s a feeling of sharing what we have because of our devotion to our family. In my case, I’m happy to share to my family. We only live once in this world and everything will pass away for sure even if we don’t think about it every day. But actually in reality, our culture is misinterpreted by foreign culture. Serving our husband is completely misinterpreted. We are considered as slaves and marriage is based upon of finding a savior from poverty. This was a real shock for me when I first heard it. We are resourceful human beings who happened to marry a foreign guy and willing to devote ourselves for the rest of our lives. I don’t want to discourage Fiiipinas to marry foreigner, but I just want to share how it feels like when you are discriminated and feeling like you are only a second citizen. Please don’t feel sorry for me because of this opinion. I just want to share what is reality when you live in a foreign country. There is a lot of misconception. But anyway I have accepted everything and I don’t react to it anymore. I have been married to a nice foreign guy for 24 years. Now I have to sleep and good night!!!

    Reply
    • Will April 26, 2015 at 12:54 pm

      I am sorry that you have come in contact with people who have that attitude, but the reality is that it does exist and is more prevalent than I would have believed. I have met several men myself who had that attitude, and it made my blood boil. It is true that Filipinas are very caring, loyal and generally undemanding, and they are real workers in the home; however, I know my wife deeply appreciates when I give her some assistance around the house. She is working on a nursing degree to help the family as I am of retirement age, and we have two small boys. Another attitude that seemed to be prevalent is that an older man would marry a Filipina with the idea of then moving to the Philippines to retire where he could turn his retirement fund into double the money and live “high on the hog” in the Philippines. I know of two men who did this with disastrous results, and I have a hard time feeling sorry for them. I can only say that my wife is a real treasure, and she, as other Filipinas, does not deserve to be thought of as a servant or second class citizen. I value her highly..

      Reply
      • Filipina April 26, 2015 at 9:00 pm

        I can feel that you are a very good husband, Will! And your wife is very lucky to have you as her lifetime partner.. It’s good to know that you care for your wife and she deeply appreciates your assistance around the house. You are one of the best!!! My beloved husband is also good of helping me with household chores. I don’t actually have a problem for this. What makes me feel sad is how the people think about us. I feel it very discriminating. I also felt lucky to have a wonderful husband and we are now married in 24 years. God will always bless you and your whole family!

        Reply
      • Juliet Connolly April 27, 2015 at 10:59 am

        I’m glad to know you have a Filipina wife, and that you have high regard of her. I’m a senior Filipina married to a retired senior American. Even before our Catholic church wedding, we already agreed to stay in Manila instead of him bringing me to the States, and for many years now, we’re happy with our life settling down in a peaceful community enjoying our day-to-day activities at home or with good neighbors somewhere in Metro Manila. We value and respect each other’s culture, that way, we get to live harmoniously. The “5 Things You Need To Know Before Marrying a Filipina” is a significant message for those wanting to marry a Filipina, and, my husband knew that all along before he married me.

        Reply
    • Cam November 17, 2017 at 2:32 pm

      Find a saviour from poverty. Well said.

      Reply
  • Billy Bob April 24, 2015 at 11:55 pm

    Bicker about who is real Filipina or not. Been married to my beautiful asawa for 25 years and I have loved every minute of it.

    Reply
    • Ruby Famous
      Ruby Famous April 25, 2015 at 9:41 pm

      That’s great to know Billy Bob! Congratulations on 25 years of beautiful union!

      Reply
  • Will April 24, 2015 at 11:09 pm

    Twelve years ago I met a Filipina online, visited her and her family and married her. We have had 12 wonderful years together and have two great little boys. I read this post, I was struck by the fact that it could have been describing my wife and her two sisters (they have both come to the US and married introduced to them. The homesickness, the respect for elders, the desire to be with elders, sending money to the Philippines and the abhorrence of wastefulness as well as the industriousness all perfectly described my wife. I would definitely take exception to the post indicating that these Filipinas are wanting to be rescued by Caucasians. My wife and I fell in love because of shared interests and a common faith in the Lord Jesus Christ. She knew long before we met in the Philippines that I was not wealthy and could rescue her from nothing. She chose me in spite of that, and we expect to live together until death do us part.

    Reply
    • Ruby Famous
      Ruby Famous April 25, 2015 at 9:45 pm

      That’s a beautiful testimony Will! And you are absolutely correct, not all Filipinas are looking for a superman, especially if they know who the real Saviour is, the One who loves them enough to die for them. I’m glad you enjoyed the post!

      Reply
  • Anastasia Bree
    Anastasia Bree April 24, 2015 at 3:09 pm

    Hi American Filipina,

    It is but sad that you think that a Philippines born woman is only shaped in terms of need and poverty. I refuse to agree that we all just want to be saved by a caucasian. I was born and raised in the Philippines. I grew up independent and had a very good job there if I must say, You see – if you read stereotyping the stereotypes – you seem to belong the stereotype. It is but sad that you as a Filipina will say such, This article is to show how we take care of our partners. Not just because they are caucasian or what have you. I will equally take care of my partner just the same even if he were to be a Filipino. Does it really matter if we are immigrant or not? Things may be different on how you who who were born here as to how we are born in the Philippines. But I must say, I will bring up my child who was born here the same way that I was brought up.

    Just so you know, not all caucasians can take care of a Filipina. WE can take care of ourselves.

    This is coming from a single mom who have not asked for any support from anyone.

    Reply
    • Robert Sylvia December 24, 2016 at 6:17 pm

      Well that’s a good story too, thanks for sharing your thoughts on the matter. I have a friend who married a Filipina-American woman, her mother lives in the states. They had problems due to mom-daughter closeness, and mom being critical of the husband and meddling. It was sad to watch the husband be castrated…and he is a hard working, nice guy. Personally, if prefer someone who is stateside (already in North America) and not as tied to past her native culture as suggested here, is that selfish? I guess a man can hope.

      Reply
  • is irrelevant April 24, 2015 at 11:08 am

    dear all , i can understand what is written in all reply’s but my home is my home periode, i am also married to a Pinay girl but don’t expect i follow that rule in there culture to take care of there parents till they pass away , they had a lifetime to make something out of there life . they spend a life time borrowing the crapp out of each other and the result is nobody has money , most have no pension or a little savings build up as all they did was thinking of today and not tomorrow and when they have 5 pesos they will spend 20 . As the cost of living will continue to go up the money send home to support there parents will dry out and there bubble of thinking to sit on your ass on in church and complaining ( i have no money) will be rewarded as the children will take care of you is wishful thinking . Stand up for your rights and march to manila and say enough is enough to the government , demand better legislation for companys to open factorys , create jobs, decent healthcare , teachers that teach instead of playing fun games with there students witch keep them stupid etc etc , make a rail road so people can travel sheap through the Philippines etc, etc. That is road forward, not borrowing from each other to support . It doesn’t get you anywhere in life , neither your children ,Open your eyes to the real facts why PH is not developing compared to other Asian countries , they are simple missing the boat due to the domination from the few rich and the corrupt government from the top to the bottom on all levels ,Thank you . .

    Reply
    • Ruby Famous
      Ruby Famous April 24, 2015 at 2:41 pm

      What an uneducated response. Philippines IS a developing country. Do you even know that the Philippines has become one of the fastest growing economies in Asia, with an annual GDP growth rate of 6.1 percent in 2014 – the second highest in the Asia-Pacific region after China? Do your research. As for taking care of our parents, this article is a guide to how we operate, you may accept it, you may not. Nobody is twisting your arm to follow culture, it is written to help you understand your Filipina wife.

      Reply
    • Tor Bristol April 24, 2015 at 11:37 pm

      You must be “asshole of the year”

      Reply
    • Tor Bristol April 25, 2015 at 12:36 pm

      I feel Sorry for your wife!

      Reply
    • Marlette Vlahoginis April 25, 2015 at 8:28 pm

      I feel s0rry f0r ur Filipina wife. Im glad my American husband d0esnt think the same way y0u think…

      Reply
    • Sid April 26, 2015 at 12:32 am

      This guy has “fecal material” for brain matter. I would ask him the following – A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat the same
      stuff – grass. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, but a horse produces clumps. Why do you suppose that is?” He would think about it and say, “Hmmm, I have no idea.” Then, I would ask him if “he really feels qualified to discuss a Filipino, life in the Philippines, and what goes on there,” when he doesn’t know shit?”

      Reply
  • American Filipina April 24, 2015 at 6:26 am

    I am an American born Filipina. My mother was born in the U.S. This article stereotypes all Filipino women. There is a clear distinction between the immigrant Filipina and the American born Filipina. The average immigrant Filipina’s nature is shaped by need and poverty. It is the wish of every Filipina in the Philippines to be rescued by a Caucasian westerner and bring her to the United States. Although your article serves to glorify the good characteristics of the immigrant Filipina you fail to distinguish the difference between American Filipinas. For the uninformed, the difference may be undetectable. American Filipinas possess some of the same qualities you refer but we are Americans before we are Filipino. Your article only further perpetuates stereotypical attitudes towards Filipinas. Thousands of American Filipinas would appreciate it if you clarify that you are referring to immigrant Filipinas. Thank you.

    Reply
    • Ruby Famous
      Ruby Famous April 24, 2015 at 2:45 pm

      Hi American Filipina, this article is clearly written for those marrying Immigrant Filipinas. If you are American before you are Filipino, then I think everyone else would consider you American. There is no need to write an article to help people understand who you are.

      Reply
      • Michael Shea July 8, 2017 at 4:06 am

        Well said Ruby…..love it.

        Reply
    • Anastasia Bree
      Anastasia Bree April 24, 2015 at 3:11 pm

      Hi American Filipina,

      It is but sad that you think that a Philippines born woman is only shaped in terms of need and poverty. I refuse to agree that we all just want to be saved by a caucasian. I was born and raised in the Philippines. I grew up independent and had a very good job there if I must say, You see – if you read stereotyping the stereotypes – you seem to belong to the stereotypes. It is but sad that you as a Filipina will say such, This article is to show how we take care of our partners. Not just because they are caucasian or what have you. I will equally take care of my partner just the same even if he were to be a Filipino. Does it really matter if we are immigrant or not? Things may be different on how you who who were born here as to how we are born in the Philippines. But I must say, I will bring up my child who was born here the same way that I was brought up.

      Just so you know, not all caucasians can take care of a Filipina. WE can take care of ourselves.

      This is coming from a single mom who have not asked for any support from anyone.

      Should there really be a distinction between an immigrant Filipina and an American Filipinqa>?

      Reply
    • Jadeerrific April 27, 2015 at 8:23 am

      I feel sorry of what you become a Filipina after being born in a foreign country. Palpably, your opinion was the most selfish and ridiculous. This article this did not mention about who you are because you are not a Filipina, and obviously don’t understand the Filipino culture and values.

      Reply
    • Shana February 16, 2016 at 2:18 pm

      Dear American Filipina, you are clearly writing to “distinguish” yourself from immigrants probably because you do not like your own Philippine heritage and are ashamed of your own culture but somehow consider yourself to be Filipino. I guess you had some bad experience in the past, maybe you got discriminated somehow because of your roots or have seen others bullying other Filipinos and that is why you sound so concerned about the technical difference between a Filipino immigrant and Filipinos born in the west. If you do not want to be associated with your Filipino heritage and if you think that all women who are born in the Philippines are only after Caucasians for a visa and money then feel free to renounce your roots. I know that some of what you say about Filipino women are sadly true. I live in Europe and I have met a lot of Filipinos who marry only for a permanent residency and money. But I have also seen other Asians and other non-white people and, heck even white people marrying white men only for convenience/money. Marrying for convenience and other bad attributes has little to do with race. The author wrote the article for foreigners who want to marry a Pinay (born and raised in the Philippines) so do not complain if she does not mention Pinays who are born and raised in the west because you are considered more Caucasian.

      Thousands will be happy if you do not call yourself a Filipina. 😉 You western girl.

      Reply
  • mikey April 24, 2015 at 1:42 am

    I have been married to a Filipina now for a year plus we have been together for 4 Years plus . Every day I feel I become a better man from knowing my Beautiful Wife and Her Family . Would it not be great if the rest of the world had the same Traditions as Filipinos . I am a very lucky man and 25 years my wife’s senior .
    This September we will have our first baby . A girl . I can’t wait . A little info goes a long way .
    Thank you for sharing your thoughts .

    Reply
    • Ruby Famous
      Ruby Famous April 24, 2015 at 2:54 pm

      Hi Mikey! Wow! Congratulations on your coming baby girl! I’m sure she will change your whole world and no doubt you will be good parents. Thank you for reading. Enjoy the married life!

      Reply
  • Gabriela April 23, 2015 at 3:13 pm

    Everything you wrote is true…it’s because people in our country are people..that’s why we send boxes to our family members…to share the wonderful life the Filipina wife now enjoys…

    Reply
    • Ruby Famous
      Ruby Famous April 23, 2015 at 5:42 pm

      That’s absolutely right Gabriela. We are very limited in everything back home, so when we encounter something new, we want to share it with them. T

      Reply
  • David April 23, 2015 at 6:11 am

    Married to the love of my life last August. Best thing thats ever happened to me, makes me want to be a better man every day.

    This list is very accurate! Thank you for such a good article.

    Reply
    • Ruby Famous
      Ruby Famous April 23, 2015 at 5:40 pm

      Congratulations David! Thanks for reading 🙂

      Reply
  • carolyn wolfe April 20, 2015 at 2:40 am

    maybe it is easier in Australia for them as I also grew up with a Grandmother and growing up in the 1960 s I also was taught to respect my elders and have travelled to the Philippines so I could meet the family and I saw first hand the poverty so I find it hard to understand the homesickness my daughter has a good husband and has taken her back home since she has been here for her grandparents Anniversary and is now arranging a trip to Canada as her Mother and brothers are moving there Her family needs to realise Australians are not wealthy people

    Reply
    • Ruby Famous
      Ruby Famous April 20, 2015 at 3:38 pm

      Hi Carolyn, thank you for reading. Your daughter in-law’s struggles, defeats, victories, and childhood memories are what makes Philippines home for her. It is familiar, it is a part of her. Just like it is mine. Some areas are disturbingly impoverished, it is corrupt, it is a 3rd world country, but it is still home. Since she has moved to Australia, she has to live a new life, make new memories, and make it her new home, but there will always be a small part of her that will care for that part of the world.

      I understand your statement about how they should realize Australians are not wealthy people. She will understand how it all works eventually. I did not understand that before as well. I was seeing kids barefoot in the streets, sleeping in boxes, and I also see that the poor people in 1st world countries at least have shoes on their feet and a roof over their heads. It took me a while to recognize that debt is involved, that perception is not always reality. It takes a little bit for us to process that. She will get there. 🙂 Thank you so much commenting!

      Reply
  • carolyn wolfe April 20, 2015 at 2:27 am

    very good story helps me to understand my daughter in law

    Reply
    • Ruby Famous
      Ruby Famous April 20, 2015 at 3:38 pm

      Thanks Carolyn! Glad to have helped 🙂

      Reply
  • chris April 17, 2015 at 1:09 am

    I agree with what you said. But don’t forget that the spouses culture is different, yet it counts too. When you say yes, it should mean yes. No should mean no. Also when the pinoy parents come into your own house to live with you they do not run your house as the tatays always think they do. They are honored guests because we love our wives, but not the bosses of the house. Also they try to tell you how to even do your shopping. They want you to go to the store once a day which does not work in modern america. The tatay tracks in mud over and over and will not listen to pleas to please take off your shoes. I am glad I have a pinay wife who is the most wonderful thing. I put kids thru college in the pinas, but the tatay cannot even be bothered to take off dirty shoes, and I am told I am too clean. There are two sides to this story and I think compromise would be correct when you come to america.

    Reply
    • Ruby Famous
      Ruby Famous April 17, 2015 at 2:09 am

      Hi Chris, I absolutely agree. My parents are the very opposite though, they barely even make a squeak when they come visit and they never bother us about always going out, almost to the point my husband thought they were unhappy. But the reason is they are respecting our space and want us to live our own lives without them being a bother. In Marriage, even with different cultures, there should be a balance. When a woman marries, her husband should be her priority..she leaves her home to be with him. At least that’s what I was taught. The husband is the man of the house, not the in-laws. Never the in-laws. I’m sorry to hear you are having a hard time with the tatay of you wife. Talk to her. She should be able to help you communicate with him better. You sound like a great guy and a respectful husband, thank you for being that way. There are too many men out there who disrespects their Filipina wives because they disagree too much. Your wife is your wife, she is a part of you. What you say about her reflects you. Thanks again.

      Reply
    • Amanda May 26, 2015 at 1:20 pm

      well chris i’m a filipina,with regard to the cleanliness ,i think it really depends on the upbringing of a certain person, as i’m very organized and wants everything to be clean as thats what i see when growing up and have disciplined that way.. but if your wife, since her childhood years, been with the dirty surrounding, don’t be surprised that she’s gong to complain that you are too clean, as she did not brought up that way and used to being dirty.. this is just an honest opinion.

      Reply
  • Leslie April 14, 2015 at 12:29 pm

    First you have to understand,, back in the day everyone lived by each other here as well,,played together and you grew up with your cousins,ect…People didnt really go to college unless you had money. You ate what you were given and drank what you were also given and that was all you had. We did not waste either, moms stayed home and dads worked. Families were big,,6 plus kids was normal. We did not vacation or travel the world. Life was simple and you appreciated it all. We had lemon aide stands and drank Kool aide,,we made go carts out of old milk crates and carriage wheels if you were lucky to find them.The milk man was also the mail man and everyone knew each other and your kids.. If someone saw you doing something wrong, they told your parents,and no one got upset with them,,you had respect and some fear of all elders because you knew you better respect . Today many people here are below the poverty level. Living in the street, families and all. Family was all we had,,grandparents were cherished,elders were respected,,somewhere things changed and not for the better, but so did technology and school and so on. You needed an education or you couldnt get a job, so now your in debt because families working could not pay to send you to school because they were just trying to feed there families. Waste is a big issue among americans because we are lucky to have excess but that doesn’t give us the right to waste, but you see most people here grew up with nothing and worked there way to something,,they struggled and saw there parents with nothing and they were pushed to have something.So when they got there, they took it all I guess. Some times people only see whats in front of them and not what it is really or what it was. When ever a child moves to another country regardless of culture ,,,someone loses,,someone longs for home. And home longs for them. Thats why when you marry in another culture you have to be willing to leave home one day and be one with your spouse,,I know its not always easy but you have to believe in each other that it will be everything you hoped it would be. You have to give it time,,near or far family will always be there. Families here dont live next to each other anymore like they used to because jobs have taken them away and they need to go because they need the money to support there families. Its not what they want always,,its a need to survive. Unfortunately governmant and greed have made people do what they have to to survive and in that families have moved miles apart. If your lucky enough to have a child that knows your struggles and never asks for anything because he knows you dont have it but will do what you can to try to give it to him,,and he dont want to put you in that situation because he knows your living paycheck to paycheck,,,you are blessed ….and when that child grows up,,and does well ,,you want him to have it all…and appreciate it..So I think it doesnt matter where you come from, what country ,,its the person you are and what you do that makes you. Culture is always a plus,but its the person themselves and there morels and whats important in life to them and what there willing to sacrifice to make it work.

    Reply
    • Ruby Famous
      Ruby Famous April 14, 2015 at 1:50 pm

      I agree with you, after all is said and done, the person that you are is still the most important thing.

      Reply
      • Alfonso April 25, 2015 at 10:57 am

        I am agree with this website, I like Filipino women…they are sexy, and beautiful; but, also they care about family and ederly people because is in their culture.

        Reply
        • Jadeerrific April 27, 2015 at 8:38 am

          Although this article deals more about marrying a Filipina, I’d like to add that it’s not only Filipino women who have unique distinctions far from other married citizens. If you marry a Filipino man, I would say you’ll observe the same culture. Males are not only responsible for taking care of their new home after marraige, but they also feel the need to provide something to their needful family. It’s a way of paying back, even when were not asked to give back. Filipinos, I could say, are very protective, brave, but soft at heart when it comes to their family. We very much value respect, honor, and patience. It’s very common for us to let our wives work in a foreign country, and do some, if not most, of their motherly tasks. We were raised in such way, and that’s what we think is right, and what we want to pass on to our generations. We value friendship a lot, in times where you need to enjoy, don’t hesitate to drink a bottle of a homemade fermented coconut wine. It’s cheap, not purely made of expensive fruits, but it’s what makes our friendships strong. We value the little things that we have, and we always look up to strangers and humbly offer them anything we have.

          Reply
          • Dorothy June 7, 2015 at 9:41 am

            I only know few things about Filipino culture, and i like the way they live with their families. I want to learn more

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